Bridging Divides
Empathy Cafe
2026-10-18

I thought it was good. You can also ask Teri, Bill and Jeff. Adding Bill here. 

12 people, 6 men, 6 women, two breakout rooms. We talked about various aspects of conflict and bridging divides, from personal to political. 

Intros were a little on the longish side, but still okay, and I think it's good that we did them in the full group. 

I took these notes during the debrief, observations, and also ideas for the future (sharing here with our names, and without names for newcomers):

1. Teri: Making time to talk about it together in Empathy Circles, what we're already doing, more of that. 

2. Set of questions for a longitudinal narrative during the Empathy Circle

3. Noticed that an active listener didn't acknowledge verbally when they were corrected by the speaker, and it would be helpful if they said that they really are trying to understand and not misrepresent. 

4. It's harder to reflect when talking about politics. 

5. Question that I may not have fully or properly answered: 

• How does empathic listening affect Red and Blue conflict in The Empathy Center? (I said that the conflicts haven't been resolved but they don't interfere with what we're doing. A better answer might be that Empathy Circle practice might make us more accepting of cognitive dissonance. We don't have to reach agreement on everything, or not every instance of disagreement merits a conflict resolution process. I could have shared that we have Restorative Empathy Circle and Restorative Circle process options available for the community.) 

6. Request for resources.
I put these resources in the Chat: 

• • Monica Guzman's book, I Never Thought of It That Way

  • Braver Angels e-courses braverangels.org and a link to our landing page, where they can find a BA free membership (link to join)

  • The Empathy Center - Empathy Circles and facilitator training  theempathycenter.org

  • Street Epistemologists International (SEI) added a link to SEI

  • Bill or Ingrid posted a link to the ECF training

7. Divisiveness requires more time; curious to know more and for more connection,—both need more time. (I understand 'more time' to mean: 4 in a circle would be better than 6, and we could have had three circles instead of two; smaller circles are better for more time, and a larger circle is better to meet more people.)

8. Jeff: Appreciation for conversations with new people and suggestion to engage in problem-solving together

9. I asked for a list of the ideals (values?) that someone shared during the circle, since I thought they'd be good topics for BA Empathy Circles (and put my email in the Chat).

The list includes possible second Suggested Topics, and if you like the idea of having a second Suggested Topic, we can switch up the second Suggested Topic at each circle. 

I asked for permission to share the followup email. For now, here's the list: 

What ideals bound us together in the US, and had us become so successful, and able to make democracy work in a way that appealed to the world?

I would suggest a few:

• • • - the immigrant idea. to arrive and be accepted.

    • - equality and belonging - that every person is "as good as any other, and better than most" (de Toqueville's phrasing)

    • -  Self-reliance and personal responsibility - as reflected in the frontier spirit, etc.

    • - individual rights (what arguably saved us from European Socialism in the 20th century - we don't tend to do things where the state imposes on the individual). Same as "freedom" more or less.

    • - self-government and democracy. no king, no mandarin class (see individual rights above)

    • - Constitutionalism - rather than a shared religion, we have a shared obligation and set of oaths for many to the US Constitution

10. Suggestion that we make time for stretching and embodying during the circle, since it's long and hard to just sit.

Also suggested that a combination of things are needed to bridge social and political divides; the Empathy Circle is one tool, combined with other things. 

11. Bill shared the benefits of the Empathy Circle; helps to break down defenses (the rest is illegible notes)

12. Ingrid: Empathy Circles are a way to contribute to a more connected world. 

Blessings for happiness ~ 

Janna